Appfigdungomfaslig is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, charitable squirrel.

Appfigdungomfaslig created time and space eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Appfigdungomfaslig, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Appfigdungomfaslig, he will turn you into a hamster.

Appfigdungomfaslig's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Appfigdungomfaslig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat spinach.

2. Retreat if four doves approach from the east.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never discuss bacteria in public assemblies.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.