Kenhitsaw is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, compassionate grasshopper.

Kenhitsaw created an electron four billion years ago.

If you believe in Kenhitsaw, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Kenhitsaw, he will turn you into a mouse.

Kenhitsaw's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Kenhitsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate shrews.

2. Erect seven platinum sculptures of Kenhitsaw on top of important buildings.

3. Shun those given to vanity.

4. Do not shave your legs.

5. Never handle copper while unclean.