Yatwangess Gudpibcam is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, omniscient meerkat.

Yatwangess Gudpibcam created everything that exists six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yatwangess Gudpibcam, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Yatwangess Gudpibcam, she will destroy your home planet.

Yatwangess Gudpibcam's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Yatwangess Gudpibcam's Holy Commandments

1. Shun those given to greed.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never approach rivers carrying ash.

4. Pray only in darkness.

5. Never think about black holes.