Sagvingun is a god.

He takes the form of a small, all-knowing spider.

Sagvingun created humankind eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagvingun, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sagvingun, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Sagvingun's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Sagvingun's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not sit at mountains.

4. Do not speak of ultrasonics near sacred fires.

5. Never mention capybaras.