Fedtanlin is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, sage cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Fedtanlin created everything that exists eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Fedtanlin, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fedtanlin, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Fedtanlin's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Fedtanlin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not consume rice at dawn.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Do not speak about cucumbers.

4. Do not chant at rivers.

5. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.