Nanbumomin is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, uncaring crab.

Nanbumomin created the planet Jupiter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Nanbumomin, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Nanbumomin, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Nanbumomin's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Nanbumomin's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse oil with water.

2. Never touch water while blessed.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ants.

4. Always check lakes for frogs.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics near ducks while wearing orange hats and balancing seven platinum spheres on your arms.