Gabnulbad is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, self-confident beaver.

Gabnulbad created Europe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gabnulbad, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gabnulbad, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Gabnulbad's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Gabnulbad's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Heed all portents.

3. Never prepare carrots during winter.

4. Never think about thermodynamics.

5. Always act with obedience when addressing priests.