Farstertof is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, fast seal.

Farstertof created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Farstertof, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Farstertof, she will have a low opinion of you.

Farstertof's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Farstertof's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never pray while filled with joy.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Put Farstertof first in all things.

5. Do not wear mauve clothing.