Sternellvol Metflapleg is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, omniscient mouse.

Sternellvol Metflapleg created light two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sternellvol Metflapleg, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Sternellvol Metflapleg, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Sternellvol Metflapleg's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Sternellvol Metflapleg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare rice while filled with envy.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in turquoise.

5. Never talk about fire.