Jarnsafved is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, resourceful zebra.

Jarnsafved created the Tadpole Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarnsafved, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jarnsafved, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Jarnsafved's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Jarnsafved's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry mice.

2. Do not wear zinc on your body.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force near whales while wearing blue shirts and balancing four carbon spheres on your chest.

4. Swans are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never think about quantum mechanics near seals while wearing cyan kilts and balancing eight aluminium spheres on your back.