Sigyartfum is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, all-powerful skunk.

Sigyartfum created an electron three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sigyartfum, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Sigyartfum, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Sigyartfum's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Sigyartfum's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of bread to cats while wearing violet jumpers.

2. Do not fashion tools from carbon.

3. Always maintain purity during fasting days.

4. Never cross crossroads at dusk.

5. Always share grapes with strangers, but never with geese.