Nurlcudran is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, strong fairy.

Nurlcudran created a quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlcudran, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nurlcudran, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Nurlcudran's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Nurlcudran's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Nurlcudran seven times a day.

2. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a room before entering it.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nurlcudran.

4. Do not wear tin on your body.

5. Always obey Nurlcudran's priests.