Jathatbarn is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, clever pig.

Jathatbarn created time and space three million years ago.

If you believe in Jathatbarn, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jathatbarn, she will not invite you to parties.

Jathatbarn's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Jathatbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of signs.

2. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

3. Do not gather at wells at dawn.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Feed all hungry grasshopers.