Yatyogvan is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, competent dove.

Yatyogvan created a quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Yatyogvan, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Yatyogvan, it will not care.

Yatyogvan's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Yatyogvan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never look at comets.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Always cleanse blood with water.