Babmumced Artyattlak is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, almighty hyena.

Babmumced Artyattlak created the planet Jupiter two million years ago.

If you believe in Babmumced Artyattlak, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Babmumced Artyattlak, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Babmumced Artyattlak's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Babmumced Artyattlak's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick geese.

2. Always act with purity when addressing strangers.

3. Always cleanse your hands after touching titanium.

4. Always remove ear rings before touching nickel.

5. Do not covet oxen.