Maddonvabspag is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, omnipotent bear.

Maddonvabspag created the planet Venus two billion years ago.

If you believe in Maddonvabspag, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Maddonvabspag, it will destroy your home planet.

Maddonvabspag's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Maddonvabspag's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Pray only in moonlight.

3. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Maddonvabspag in the centre of the settlement.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always cleanse your hands after touching silicon.