Bonmapbogjipbap is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, strong fly.

Bonmapbogjipbap created dark energy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bonmapbogjipbap, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bonmapbogjipbap, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bonmapbogjipbap's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Bonmapbogjipbap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak of quantum mechanics near sacred fires.

2. Do not name children after dogs.

3. Do not step barefoot upon magenta earth.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.