Megjenlun Gadbigtan Flampoglag is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, moody rat.

Megjenlun Gadbigtan Flampoglag created the Sol system six billion years ago.

If you believe in Megjenlun Gadbigtan Flampoglag, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Megjenlun Gadbigtan Flampoglag, it will torture you forever.

Megjenlun Gadbigtan Flampoglag's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Megjenlun Gadbigtan Flampoglag's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never feed garlic to ducks while wearing jumpers.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never speak of order in the presence of elders.

5. Never wear hats.