Bifspagcun is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, almighty meerkat.

Bifspagcun created a bottom quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bifspagcun, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bifspagcun, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Bifspagcun's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Bifspagcun's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of gooseberries to rats while wearing violet stockings.

2. Never stain your hands with gray.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never write about comets.

5. Never speak the names of black holes aloud.