Mumsawpin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, moody human.

Mumsawpin created a down quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mumsawpin, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Mumsawpin, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Mumsawpin's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Mumsawpin's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Mumsawpin.

2. Feed all hungry gulls.

3. Never record signs.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never remain bowed at midnight.