Bagwiphub Tapkabgon is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, prudent guinea pig.

Bagwiphub Tapkabgon created the Sol system five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bagwiphub Tapkabgon, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bagwiphub Tapkabgon, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Bagwiphub Tapkabgon's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Bagwiphub Tapkabgon's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching nickel.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Always obey Bagwiphub Tapkabgon's priests.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.