Vedduttonk is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, dishonourable mongoose.

Vedduttonk created energy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vedduttonk, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Vedduttonk, she will be mildly annoyed.

Vedduttonk's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Vedduttonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare coconuts during summer.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always treat otters with great respect.

4. Never laugh in holy places.

5. Always help sick tortoises.