Arfnurtbamkomflow is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, ill-tempered aardvark.

Arfnurtbamkomflow created energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfnurtbamkomflow, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Arfnurtbamkomflow, he will jump up and down on your head.

Arfnurtbamkomflow's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Arfnurtbamkomflow's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick foxes.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Worship no other gods but Arfnurtbamkomflow.

4. Do not take Arfnurtbamkomflow's name in vain.

5. You must never eat rice.