Hivmapyogbuntetti is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, all-knowing mouse.

Hivmapyogbuntetti created a quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hivmapyogbuntetti, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Hivmapyogbuntetti, she will turn you into a rock.

Hivmapyogbuntetti's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Hivmapyogbuntetti's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove ear rings before entering holy places.

2. Never gather four great tits in one place.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Always share oranges with strangers, but never with horses.

5. Heed all dreams.