Konyarllarp is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, slow hedgehog.

Konyarllarp created the planet Venus eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Konyarllarp, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Konyarllarp, he will throw large rocks at you.

Konyarllarp's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Konyarllarp's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Badgers are not to be trusted.

3. Always share strawberries with strangers, but never with rats.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.