Zenmislak Pithenbut is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, merciful dolphin.

Zenmislak Pithenbut created a bottom quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Zenmislak Pithenbut, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Zenmislak Pithenbut, he will try to impress you with trees.

Zenmislak Pithenbut's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Zenmislak Pithenbut's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of numbers.

2. Do not record names concerning moons.

3. Do not consume melons at dawn.

4. Always store wheat above ground.

5. Never remain standing at dusk.