Hamniltal is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, slow dingo.

Hamniltal created gold nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hamniltal, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Hamniltal, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Hamniltal's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Hamniltal's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather three dolphins near wells.

2. Never talk about amino acids.

3. Always help sick hamsters.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics near eagles while wearing magenta corsets and balancing nine copper spheres on your hands.

5. Heed all dreams.