Camfundav is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, stupid capybara.

Camfundav created a top quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Camfundav, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Camfundav, it will ignore you.

Camfundav's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Camfundav's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

2. Pray only in firelight.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never wear green hats.

5. Never feed coconuts to sheep while wearing yellow shirts.