Flapfeblit is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unselfish scorpion.

Flapfeblit created humanity five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flapfeblit, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Flapfeblit, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Flapfeblit's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Flapfeblit's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not hurt ducks.

3. Always obey Flapfeblit's priests.

4. Do not prepare figs while filled with envy.

5. Always store aubergines above ground.