Legmutfotvolmintad is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, amazing donkey.

Legmutfotvolmintad created the Black Eye Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Legmutfotvolmintad, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Legmutfotvolmintad, he will destroy your home solar system.

Legmutfotvolmintad's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Legmutfotvolmintad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about solid mechanics.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never fashion tools from bone.

4. Never allow gulls to witness sacred rites.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.