Wabzimbod is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, weak penguin.

Wabzimbod created tapeworms three billion years ago.

If you believe in Wabzimbod, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Wabzimbod, it will send you a sign.

Wabzimbod's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Wabzimbod's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle gold while unclean.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Hide if five hamsters approach from the east.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never think about quantum gravity.