Wotnurtfoss is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, omniscient fly.

Wotnurtfoss created a bottom quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wotnurtfoss, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Wotnurtfoss, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Wotnurtfoss' most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Wotnurtfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat beans on holy days.

2. Never remain bowed at dawn.

3. Never stain your back with indigo.

4. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Run away if three ants approach from the south.