Banjam is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, capable lobster.

Banjam created silver seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Banjam, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Banjam, she will turn you into a mole.

Banjam's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Banjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep eight mice in a large pit.

2. Never eat beans.

3. Never remain prostrate at dusk.

4. Remain bowed during prayer.

5. Never curse while facing west.