Dubfosshugdodgupvinfonman is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, humorless fly.

Dubfosshugdodgupvinfonman created oxygen two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dubfosshugdodgupvinfonman, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Dubfosshugdodgupvinfonman, he will turn you into a puffin.

Dubfosshugdodgupvinfonman's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Dubfosshugdodgupvinfonman's Holy Commandments

1. Do not name children after mice.

2. Do not consume turnips at dawn.

3. Do not take Dubfosshugdodgupvinfonman's name in vain.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always wash your hands before prayer.