Bogjenmif is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, overgenerous eagle.

Bogjenmif created the world three million years ago.

If you believe in Bogjenmif, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Bogjenmif, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Bogjenmif's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Bogjenmif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about peas.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate swans.

3. Never point your hands toward the north during prayer.

4. Never stain your legs with purple.

5. Heed all visions.