Wikfotflig Fodtimtal is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, contented bird.

Wikfotflig Fodtimtal created Africa five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wikfotflig Fodtimtal, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wikfotflig Fodtimtal, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Wikfotflig Fodtimtal's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Wikfotflig Fodtimtal's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from fawn foxes, for they are unholy.

2. Do not sing at crossroads.

3. Do not name children after frogs.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.