Wigbigsas is a god.

He takes the form of a small, temperamental deer.

Wigbigsas created a quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Wigbigsas, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Wigbigsas, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Wigbigsas' most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Wigbigsas' Holy Commandments

1. Never discuss archaea in public assemblies.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never speak aloud of secrets.