Bethatweg is a god.

He takes the form of a large, calm swallow.

Bethatweg created Africa nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bethatweg, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bethatweg, he will throw large rocks at you.

Bethatweg's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Bethatweg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair fawn.

2. Do not wear orange clothing.

3. Never leap in the presence of bats.

4. Always remove stockings before entering holy places.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bethatweg.