Sabcidzak is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, egotistical fly.

Sabcidzak created humankind nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Sabcidzak, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Sabcidzak, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Sabcidzak's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Sabcidzak's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never speak aloud of numbers.

3. Never think about nucleic acids.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never prepare beans during autumn.