Fossflabarp is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, awe-inspiring spider.

Fossflabarp created the Sol system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fossflabarp, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fossflabarp, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Fossflabarp's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Fossflabarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with orange.

2. You must never eat peas.

3. Never wear fawn tights on sacred days.

4. Hide if nine doves approach from the west.

5. Never write about ultrasonics.