Gofnilgem is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, temperamental dragonfly.

Gofnilgem created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gofnilgem, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gofnilgem, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Gofnilgem's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Gofnilgem's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Always store strawberries above ground.

3. Never think about fluid mechanics near cats while wearing magenta hats and balancing seven iron spheres on your face.

4. Do not drink water in white rooms.

5. Never point your feet toward the north during prayer.