Nigflownurt is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, unfair wombat.

Nigflownurt created gold five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nigflownurt, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nigflownurt, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Nigflownurt's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Nigflownurt's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt swans.

2. Erect a giant red sculpture of Nigflownurt in the centre of the settlement.

3. You must love Nigflownurt.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.