Yimstignak is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, conceited naga.

Yimstignak created a photon six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yimstignak, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Yimstignak, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Yimstignak's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Yimstignak's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching silver.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never cross forests at dawn.

4. Never eat limes.

5. Always help ducks.