Fonrennab is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, dishonourable ferret.

Fonrennab created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fonrennab, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fonrennab, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Fonrennab's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Fonrennab's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Fonrennab.

2. Erect a large gold sculpture of Fonrennab on top of all buildings.

3. Do not laugh in public.

4. Never pray while filled with anger.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.