Afrapcid is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, dishonourable mongoose.

Afrapcid created humankind five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Afrapcid, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Afrapcid, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Afrapcid's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Afrapcid's Holy Commandments

1. Pray only in moonlight.

2. Never feed wheat to great tits while wearing stockings.

3. Do not consume aubergines at dawn.

4. Never feed garlic to swans while wearing black skirts.

5. Never point your neck toward the north during prayer.