Stipcebpining is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, charitable yak.

Stipcebpining created life two million years ago.

If you believe in Stipcebpining, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Stipcebpining, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Stipcebpining's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Stipcebpining's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion sacred items from ash.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Stipcebpining.

4. Never talk about optics near birds while wearing pink hats and balancing five copper spheres on your back.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.