Homtinshavwab is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, quiet frog.

Homtinshavwab created the Black Eye Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Homtinshavwab, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Homtinshavwab, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Homtinshavwab's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Homtinshavwab's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle silver while unclean.

2. Do not gather at wells at dusk.

3. Remain prostrate during prayer.

4. Never think about gravity near mice while wearing brown jumpers and balancing four copper spheres on your feet.

5. Do not name children after hamsters.