Zenvegcemdun is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, self-assured lobster.

Zenvegcemdun created the Tadpole Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Zenvegcemdun, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Zenvegcemdun, it will turn you into a slug.

Zenvegcemdun's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Zenvegcemdun's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Zenvegcemdun must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never wear purple rings on sacred days.

4. Always remove skirts before touching silver.

5. Always cleanse oil with water.