Cittam is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, temperamental cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Cittam created a photon three billion years ago.

If you believe in Cittam, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cittam, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Cittam's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Cittam's Holy Commandments

1. Never remain prostrate at dawn.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Cittam on top of all buildings.

3. Do not travel during autumn.

4. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

5. Never go into blue rooms.