Hugxenloop is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, deceitful manatee.

Hugxenloop created the planet Jupiter two million years ago.

If you believe in Hugxenloop, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Hugxenloop, he will turn you into a puffin.

Hugxenloop's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Hugxenloop's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Never touch blood while blessed.

3. Never think about quantum gravity.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never hurt birds.